1, 2, 3, 4(00), De Grees Burning Down the House, Or Revenage Of The Spinach

Ok I am back on line. Yeah!!! I am at the new home enjoying the bath tub so much I look like an old man who needs plastic surgery. The room is smaller, but it looks like all or most of my bedroom set will fit. I have a few kinks to work out yet. I would love to write about how I got locked in the bathroom that has the tub (there are 2 bathrooms here) for 10 minutes. Pounding on the door pleading for Jose and Justin (he's the second roommate) to get me a lock smith so I could get out. Needless to say they never herd me and the door finally unlocked and I was free at last!!!

I remember going over to my best friend Greg's house in my teens. He used to have a beat up VW bug with no heater(a bitch in the cold Pennsylvania winters) and who was the spitting image of Benny Hill. MTV was just born, punk and new wave rock was becoming popular, groups like the Clash, Sex Pistols (Mommy what's a Sex Pistol?) B52s and the Talking Heads. I remember the Talking Heads Video "Burning Down the House." The group members being all in cream colored suits, with dark sunglasses on, in front of some television monitors. Like most people "Burning Down The House" was and still is my favorite Talking Heads song. Last night I was reminded of that song.

Last night after work I stopped by Safeway to pick up a Select four cheese, self rising pizza for supper which is my favorite. I get home and open the package, read the directions. Turn oven on to 400 degrees, place pizza on center rack, do not preheat oven. So I do as the instructions require, then ask Jose if he like to join me for a smoke outside. 1, 2, 3, 4, Burning Down The House, well Mikey almost did that last night.

You see one of the former tenants sabotaged the house for the new residents of the house that would be living here. Before I get to what he did to the oven, I want to tell you he also melted candle wax in the microwave and I am sure he did more and will find out later what else he sabotaged. Back to story.

So, Jose and I are out in the car port puffing away and I hear this beeping sound thinking someone's car alarm is going off far away. Now the car port is in the front of the house, the kitchen in back (this place is very long), we get done smoking and realize the smoke detector is blaring. We rush into the kitchen to find Justin there, (I didn't even know he was home, and he could break men's and women's hearts alike if he had a good eyebrow waxing) encased by smoke. The kitchen, dining room, and the reading room were all filled with black smoke.

Justin turning on the stove fan to clear the smoke, I turned off the oven (it's the first time any of us used it(we all moved in 2 days ago.)and Jose noticing food in the broiler section of the stove trough one of the slits in the oven. I looked up to find an oven mit, open the broiler door to find out something was place there so it would catch on fire when we turned on the oven.

grabbing the pan with the oven mit I run to the sink with the pan and doused it with cold water. The former tenant had put two packages of cream spinach underneath. The house has just been renovated and had that nice fresh paint smell to it, now smelling of burnt cardboard and plastic. Yes he put it in there cardboard, boiling bags, and all. This just gives me a whole new reason to hate spinach!!