Dreamer

For the last two to three months I was really down. So down they wanted me to go on medications. I knew those months would be hard for me but didn't realize what I would endure. Now as of the first of the year, as Patti La Belle would say " I have a new attitude, I am feeling good from my head to my shoes."

I am so digging life right now. My health in all aspects just keep improving. Learning HIV is not a death sentence anymore like it was in the 80's and early 90's. Everyday I am pushing myself to be more active, the only draw back is I'm hungry 24-7.

I have started to look to the future. Thinking yes the possibilities are out there for me just waiting to be grabbed. Going into the local surf shops, looking at wetsuits again, soft topped boards, and bodyboards. I received the ok to go back into the water!!! The four, three neoprene suits where like diamonds in my eyes. Not to struggle to live day to day wondering if I was going to be sick. Hope and dreams are entering my being. Wishes and fantasy become a pleasant nights slumber experiences, instead of the vivid nightmares of the past year and half. I have always been a dreamer. To start to want more from life is a huge breakthrough for me. To have meaning and striving for new goals this world will bring me. Yes I will have crisis in my life for that's the way life works. Maybe they won't be as powerful as they were for awhile and I can breath and enjoy life, and celebrate who I am.