Poz Mikey

3/01/2006

Does Anyone Have A Sex Toy?


Oops I did it again. Yes, Mikey set off the smoke dectectors again. I really am a good cook, but last night I broiled a piece of meat and 3 of the smoke dectectors started screaming like banshees in heat. Wailing like the baby in the house who is teething right now.

I was like "Fuck this shit, I can't broil a piece of meat till it's done without setting you guys off?" I started yelling does anyone have a baseball bat, or a dildo so I can break these damn things!!! Yes I was so pissed, I was ready to use a plastic penis by the balls, slam that suckers dry without lube till those suckers broke..

I am sure "The Org. Would had loved that!!" "We have to kick you out of the house, Mikey. Not only is the house a fire hazard now from the broken smoke dectectors. You assaulted communal property with a plastic cock and you have to reimburse us for the damage you caused from using the plastic penis!!" No one in the house would give me theirs, and I refused to break out mine.

In the end I had to climb up on a chair and remove the batteries from those 3 fuckers so I could finish my meal. They are on my shit list and next time I will pull out one of my dildos, or vibrators and smash the fuckers.

5 Comments:

  • dude, you are seriously on a hormonal binge, aren't you? we're going to have to do something about that sometime soon...not me and you, of course, but me finding someone to find you...or something along those lines.

    - jules

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At 10:45 PM  

  • I think my glands are making up for four years of surpresstion. I feel like a teenager in puberty

    By Blogger Mikey, At 7:25 AM  

  • I'm sorry, but that's something I would want to see captured on video.

    Smoke detector assaulted by dildo... video at 10!

    By Anonymous Kevin, At 7:29 AM  

  • that is a whole new definition of cock blocking!

    My dildo? Noi way it would have been destroyed for purposes that involve me and some lube. Or catching on fire!

    By Blogger Party Girl, At 8:16 AM  

  • you can't borrow my dildo either.

    :) sizz

    By Blogger Sizzle, At 1:29 PM  

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