Death Of The Carport, Backyard Flasher

My new place is a very kewl, very long rancher. So my bedroom windows are ground level and they are about 3x5 feet long. I have two of these long suckers in my bedroom. Till today, I had to sleep wearing all my clothes. I would have to dress in the bathroom so I would have privacy. I am sure my roommates would have loved seeing my penis along with the rest of the older neighbors.

Thank god for Jill and Bob the couple who has the baby. They gave me a curtain rod that is long enough, and very heavy canvas drapes that cover the window that faces the carport. So when I am checking out craig's list men seeking men, now no one can see what hell I am doing.

As for my window that faces the backyard. I went into the outside wash room and found a blind that is long enough, but does not quite reach the bottom of the window. The mirror on my dresser covers most of it, I still need some type of window planter, or stained glass window catchers to cover the rest of the area.

At least tonight I will be able to sleep how I like to sleep. Should I develop a "kick stand" tonight in my sleep at least now the whole neighborhood can't make a Rob Lowe, Paris Hilton, Scott Stapp, or Kid Rock sex video of my bedroom unless I want them to make a video. Yes Death to the car port, backyard flasher. I so have to make Jill and Bob dinner one night.

Dating

Where do I begin to start. Ok, I will just bring it out. I am terrified right now of dating. I am so afraid of infecting someone, or even dating someone else who is positive. I know all the forms of safe sex. I have talked to professional consolers about this problem. I am afraid to really put myself out in "The Real Dating World."

I haven't been on a date or been intimate in about four years. I don't know if I really can deal with it right now. It's only been 17 months since I found out I was positive. When I found out I had full blown AIDS and thrush. Finally the thrush is gone, and my viral load is undetectable so I only have HIV.

The reason I am bring this up is that I put my profile on a site for people who are positive. Of the responses I received only two of them are my type. I am so afraid to respond back. I don't know if I am rushing into something I can't handle, or if I am just waiting for my soul mate.

Right now I am having sexual feelings again. I want to go out, be with a partner and have fun. I want to enjoy another mans company. The fear I think is paralyzing me. I know a lot of people who fool around with one night stands and don't tell that partner they are positive. I don't think I could do that to a person.

So I am sitting here contemplating on my ass pondering. When is it the right time for me to start dating again? Maybe I need one night with "Geek Slut" to over cum my fear.

Ok I don't read horoscopes, but this is what my yahoo one said today after writing this post;

Quickie: Sit down and relax doing too many things on the go will leave you ungrounded.

Overview: Get rid of all the white noise that's distracting you from the task at hand. You might actually be paralyzed by fear of success, which is just as common as fear of failure. Acknowledge the fear, and then move past it.

An Olympic Size Blow Job

I don't know how many of you saw the closing ceremony to the Olympics. I had one of my restless nights tossing and turning so I turned on the TV. When this came on I said "I want a blow job too, that looked like it would be so fun". There were 3 aerialist using a wind machine floating above center stage. I was thinking how rad is that for entertainment. I had seen it only once before featured in a movie. The immense giant fan spin below you ready to slice and dice you. Picking you up like a feather, then free falling into a fluff mat. It made me jealous because I wanted to be that person. Does anyone know where I can get a blow job?

5 More To "THE LIST"

5 Things I want to do before I die

a) Go in a shark cage with a large great white swimming near me

b) Go hot air ballooning

c) Go hang gliding

d) Go Bungy jumping

e) Go Skydiving

Hey look more fucking links LOLOL

Links, Cat, Matthew

I am doing an easy posting today. After my 5 list blog with 22 related links I'm saying what the fuck.

I was watching VH1 with my ex Matthew who came to visit me. I hadn't herd about the fat cat in the news. They showed the kitty and said it had a 31 inch waist. This came out of my mouth "Damn that cat has a bigger waist then I do (BTW I have a 28 waist or boys 16 pants)!!" Matthew fell off the sofa laughing his ass off.

Later since we hadn't seen each other in a few week Matthew and myself went out to eat. He had asked me if I had "used" lately. I told him the truth that I hadn't but getting the urge. He goes is this bi-annual no I said tri-annual about once every 4 to 6 months Yes I do want to use one night and be with a hot dude all night long. I just need to find the right dude and yes, I do know it's not good for me.

The 5 List Post For Ms. Sizzle

Before I start don't forget about the blooger whore contest.

5 Movies or DVD's I Love

a) Jaws-"Your going to wait until the shark comes up and bites you on the ass."

b)Aliens-"Get away from her you bitch!"

c) Young Frankenstein-"There wolf, There Castle."

d)Akira-"Kanedaaaa!!!"

e)Murder On the Orient Express -"I believe the name was Greenwood"

5 Books or series I love

a)M.Y.T.H

b)Incarnations of Immortality

c)Harry Potter

d)The Belgariad

e)The Educated Heart

5 Men who I would like to make my one sexual fantasy cum true

a) Matt Kessler

b)Jeffery Buttle

c)Michael Phelps

d) Marcus Schenkenberg

e)Geek Slut

f) Jeremy Bloom

5 people I wonder Where are they now?

a)Eddie The Eagle

b)Dame Edna

c) Jan Michael Vincent

d)Lance Kerwin

e)Mark Hamill

5 Favorite songs

a) Like A prayer (Madonna)

b) Pity The Child (Chess Sound track)

c)I Melt with you

d) Guilty (Lime)

e)It's Raining men (The Weather Girls){You knew I had to have at least one gay song in there LOL}

f) Relax (Frankie Goest to Hollywood) Damn that was six oh well!!!

5 People I can't stand

a) Martha stewart

b)Dr. Phil

c)Martha Stewart

d)Dr. Phil

e)Martha Stewart


5 Stage roles I would had loved to played

a)Pippin

b) Allen in Equuas

c)P.T. Barnum in Barnum

d)Witch Boy in Dark of the Moon

e)Che in Evita

Enjoy the links they were a bitch!!

Working On List

It's going to take me a little while to get the links I want for my list asked by Ms. Sizzle. Stay tuned tomorrow it will be post. Also don't forget the blogger whore contest!!!

Sexual Innuendoes and Talking Sex

I don't know what was going on at work yesterday. Everybodys mind was in the gudder!!! I was bending down to get something out of a cabinet for my boss and he says to me" While you are down there" My god he is so not my type. Then there was a client talking on the cell phone to her daughter saying." I am getting a blow job from my boss and his new assistant" Wait a minute lady first you have the wrong equipment and second you look like Masha from the M.Y.T.H. series. For those of you who know Mama G she was her build.

When I first arrived at work, Wild S grabbed my tight, bubble butt. A friend of mine told me "You are a toned white man with a black man's ass." Damn, I know I amorous as hell right now( for not being intimate with anyone in almost four years) and want my fantasy too come true, but I am not into 60 something year old women who have had more plastic surgery then Joan Rivers. Then there was this transgender talking how she was making out with an Egyptian dude, reached down and grabbed his crotch and said"Your to big for me, laters." I just love my job!!! Thanks Ben At TGIFHOUNDS for the pic.

Blogger Whore Contest

I am differing my posting tonight to Kapgar. He is running a contest which I think is the kewlest idea someones had in a long time. Please see his posting for February 21 and the 23 and have fun.

Stripping

About 15 years ago I was a male exotic dancer in Baltimore MD. I danced my pants off for 5 years at club known as the Alantis. This was one of my most favorite jobs I had in my life. Some of you might think, yuck some scanky old man putting their hand on your privates. Well I will tell you, that feeling leaves quite quickly when your taking home anywhere between 100 to 600 dollars a night. This Asian guy (who I had a big crush on) and myself used to do acrobatics tricks on the bar, loaded with glasses we used to do some tumbling on the bar that was only about two feet wide. Sometimes the Asian guy and myself were on the same set we used to get on opposite sides of the bar and do synchronized dive rolls over the registers. The customers who were regulars knew when we were setting this up and use to shout out"IN COMING!!!"(Thanks Norm, everyone knew your name. Are you still with the Baltimore Colts band?) Later I found out they went to the full monty. I wouldn't have worked there if I had to go nude. I also met my ex Matthew there. He was a customer and I was a dancer.

For any of you who have scene the John Waters movie Pecker, the bar I worked at is shown in that film as a strip joint. (I was already in California when the film was made) I met John a few times there while he was filming in Baltimore. He always had a young entourage around him at all times.

Ok I am going to out another celebrity since he's dead now and he can't sue me. Paul Winfield tried to take me home with him one night. Paul was into short, white toned men . I guess since I worked at a gay strip joint in his mind I was also a hustler. Wrong. Sorry about that Paul I am into Whites, Latinos and Asians.

During this time period, one of the regulars asked me to do a photo shoot for him. I still have a few of the pictures that were taken. One is shown on this posting. He was a semi professional photographer and made me very comfortable during the shoot. Having seen his work displayed before, I agreed to do the shoot. He asked me later in the shoot if I would do a few nude shots. Yes I posed nude for someone. Someone, somewhere in Baltimore Md. has a few birthday suit shots of me. By this time I am sure more then one person has nude pic of me. Damn, I should surf the net to see if I can find one!!!

I am a little more reserved now. I still have my killer legs, but need a little more work on my upper body. Watch out Jules I may just one day strip for you at your new job at the county for old times sake!!! You too Ms. Sizzle!!!

Question Of The Day

I had a really long day at work and don't feel like writing. I do have one question for everyone. Should a policeman get a citation for parking longer then 20 minutes in a 20 minute designated parking zone when he is on personal business?

Molotov Cocktails and Black Widow

A few days ago they found eight Molotov cocktails in a park near my new home. Now my new place is in a very nice neighborhood. How sick was that? The Molotov were in eight beer bottles filled with gas. There has been a string of arson fires south of Santa Cruz in a town known as Watsonville.

Jill my roommate said" Damn now I am afraid to take my baby and puppy to that park." To me that is sick and twisted and dangerous for the young children that play there. Not only that, gas is so expensive now a days. Hell if the wanted to use methane gas they could just come into my bed room. The HIV meds I take give me more gas then a Nazi gas chamber.

As I was writing this post I felt something crawling behind my ear. I brush off my ear, I don't feel it any more. A few seconds later I look down at the back of my hand, there is a freakin' Black Widow spider on the the back of my hand. I don't think it bit me anywhere but I am totally creeped out now. I am scratching everywhere checking to see if anymore are on me. I will have trouble getting to sleep tonight!! I am going to take a shower!!

Oprah

Ok I admit I was watching Oprah today and they had Katrina victims on her show. Granted I know the hurricane was bad, but one person said this families story was never told.(sob) Well let's just say a good friend of mine told me I should write a book about my life. Surviving Three Mile Island (See January31 posting), what I had been through the last 17 months with finding out I had HIV and my struggles and tribulations.

When is Oprah going to do a show on that. How people with HIV can loose almost everything they have, fighting the system just to live a normal life. Never once did she mention how people with HIV can not get their medications in that area. She had all these "families" on but what about the people who are getting sicker and sicker from HIV in that area. They didn't mention that either.

Has HIV been pushed in the back of peoples minds? Has HIV become the forgotten disease? Are people becoming to complacent about this world wide plague? I know a few of my readers deal with HIV on a daily basis, I am talking to those in the general public. I want to know what needs to be done for HIV to come into the public awareness again?

Many of us forget that last February in New York City there was a mutated super virus that was resistant to the medications. This one was killing people in a three month time span. Does everyone with the virus have to get the super virus for the government to take action. Does the CDC have to make another national announcement again to get HIV awareness brought back into the media? I hope I am not sounding bitter today but Oprah's show just really pissed me off.

The Hounds

For some reason my life is being surrounded by "The Hounds." Like I said I had lunch with Jules yesterday and her miniature greyhound tried to hump my arm all day. I think he smelled the female lab that is in our house for a few months. Can we just say he needed some "private time" for he was fully erect. Sorry Iggy I am not into beastiality.

Then there is Ben's dogs at tgifhounds. I love what he does to Rufus and Roscoe(shown). Everytime I go to his sight I am "ROFLMAO." They say laughter is the best medicine and I love to laugh at these two hounds. They are so cute you really need to check out his site.

I didn't forget you Lola. Lola is Jules's slightly over weight beagle(part of the hound family). I love how she will lay on the couch not move any part of her body but her tail. How can she do that? I think the universe is telling me I should be a hound dog too.

Thank You Jules And Solonor

Today I had lunch with my good friend Jules and her boys. Jules informed me today that she was going to make me a blog whore. So about after half an hour trying to get blog roll go to my e mail account she set me up with a G mail account. Instantaneously blog roll went to that account. Looking at the template script Jules and I were both scratching our asses trying to figure out where in the script goes in the freaking code .

So right in the middle of working on my links Solonor IM's Jules. Jules reluctantly asked him How much he knewscript codes. He wrote back I am an (S)uper geek. With in minutes he had my blog roll done. There are a few things I need to do with the code. Thank you two for making me the whore I want to be!!

Would You Like Some Cheese With That ...

I don't know if it's that I am feeling better or what, but I am finding myself to be real whinny lately. You know those times when every little thing irritates you. For example, who took the cheese grater and where the hell did it go? I know it was there the other day, now it's no where to be found. Who would give something like that away, or as gift? Here's a present for you, a used cheese grater. Is that called re-gifting?

Yes, right now I do have to admit I am happier then I have been in a long time. My problem seems to be I have to replace things that I had already owned which is costing me money I don't really have, or shouldn't have to shell out due to I already owned it.

Another question I have is, where is my nose hair trimmers? Oh gross here's a used nose hair trimmers for you.You see it's those little things that I have to keep replacing. It is really irritating me and getting under my skin. Having HIV I thought in the last year small things wouldn't get under my skin anymore. Wrong!!! I guess that is part of the human pysche. When things are going well we look to see what conflict we can cause, or what is wrong in our lives. Can we ever truly be happy as the human race. Do we need to evolve to the next plateau to enjoy our being? So Mikey, do you want some cheese with that whine?

Anne Rice On Broadway?

When I found this out last night, it was one of the few times I wished I still lived in east coast. Opening this year is Lestat the musical on Broadway. Based on the Anne Rice novel. The music is being done by Sir Elton John and Bernie Taupin. Personally I liked "Queen of the Damned" (pun intended) better then Lestat, but this looks like it 's going to be amazing.

I have notice my creative writing hasn't been up to par lately. Sorry Bloggers!!

Favorite Sites

I love being back on line with a faster DSL. There are certain sites I like to visit. So here are a few of my favorite sites

• AMV Hell 3 for you anime fans
• USGS Recent Earthquakes
• Family Guy
• KSBW for weather
• Stupid Videos
• Statler and Waldorf from the balcony
• Asian Backstreet Boys
• Evil Penguin 2
• Brokeback To The Future
• Hobbit Folk Rock

Enjoy Mikey

The Perfect Gift

Today I forgot it was my one month anniversary working for my boss. He was slightly late today, by the time he got there I had everything ready for him. He walks in says hello, who is my first client and I inform him it's Maria.

An hour or two goes by, then he asked me to step in the room. I am thinking "oh shit how did I screw up, what did I do wrong." He says to me "Thank you Mikey This is a one month gift for you for doing so well. I open it up, it is a so good coffee set, a bag of coffee, a mug, and a mug warmer I can use later to heat up oil when I get back into massage. I knew he read my "Addiction Symptoms of a coffee whore." He got me the perfect gift.

He's Back!!

After fighting with SBC I am back up and running. I so wanted to write "Can I cap your ass too" about the vice president" or How the house filled with smoke when we lite the fire place but it's 1:30 and I have to be up at 7:30. So will write good blog later today.

Owner Of The lonely Hearts

Ok, I wasn't going to write about Valentines day but decided I need to put my two cents in. Ever notice how the advertising world makes us feel ashamed we a single. Showing couples cuddling on the couch, kissing, hugging, taking walks holding hands. Showing us chocolate, roses, diamonds trying to tell us that something is wrong with us if we don't have someone to share it Valentines day.

I don't know if I am ready for a relationship yet, but I know my fingers are flying over the keys writing this post. It would be nice to find out if I am ready. I do know I like Asian man in tights thanks Torino LOLOL. I know Remy I am gaying up my blog again like I did on the phone the other night when I said. "Walk the husband and kiss the dogs, because I couldn't kiss the husband and walk the dogs." I know you would deck me if I tried LOLOLOL. Oh yeah you are sooo not my type anyway.

All those people who have working relationships take a moment today and think of us the owner of the lonely hearts.

The Back Flip

For 18 years of my life I was a gymnast. My father was the person who got me interested in gymnastic. At the age of 6 he taught me how to stand on my head, after that I was hooked. I would stand on my head so much when my mother went to talk to me she was always talking to my feet. I stood on my head so much all the hair rubbed off. Yes I was a bald headed 6 year old.

All through grade school gymnastics was my favorite in gym class. I was ask to put on a demonstration representing the boys class and my friend Lori was the girls class at a parents teachers night.

In junior high I was allowed to practice with the boys high school team. I loved it. In high school I was co captain of our team and set the school record for tumbling. A record that stood for ten years before I broke it.

In college, I was tenth in division 3 north Alantic championships. I missed going to nationals by two spots.(damn) After college I taught a few times and worked out anywhere I could the gym, the backyard(No, I didn't do my most difficult tricks on the grass).

So now I am 43 and live at a house with a very nice backyard. Justin (who I call Church Mouse cause he's so quite) and I were in the yard and the grass looked too tempting to me. I informed Justin I feel like doing a round off back flip. Giving little thought of my age I went for it. Holy Shit Batman I made it around without hurting myself. Was it my best? No it was low and I put my hands down on the landing. I shouldn't expect perfection for not having done one in years. I am just amazed that my body at 43 could still do a back flip. Justin was totally blown away I could do a flip.

Question Of The Day

Is Ms. Sizzles friend Tomato, the same Flying Tomato who won gold in the Olympics? What an adventure if he is!!!

A Sad Day For Sharks And For Me Too

Author Peter Benchley died this weekend. For those who don't know Benchley, he wrote the book, and the screen play of "Jaws." Benchley made a cameo appearance in Jaws as the reporter on the beach wearing glasses. His book fascinated me into learning all I can about sharks even today I am still learning. Yes when shark week comes on it's best not to disturb me. Later in life Benchley became an advocate of shark preservation speaking about the benefits of sharks. One of my ultimate fantasies is to see a large Great White up close in a shark cage.

Thanks G. T.

I absolutly adore Jules and Remy's boys. For about 10 years I have had a model from the movie Aliens. Me not being good with models. Yes I am the person who only gets his fingers stuck together, high from the fumes, and always have pieces left over when it is finished. G. T. said he would put my model together for me. So I went over to Jules and Remy's place to clean and left the model for G.T., thinking it will take him awhile for him to finish. Calling Jules a few days later I asked if G.T.had time to look at my model. Jules informed me not only did he look at it but it was ready and waiting. "What" I said. "Oh yeah he had it done in less then a half an hour."

So Thank you G.T and it may take a little while but I am going to get you something special for completing something I could never do. If you are wondering where it's at? It is on the top shelf of my computer table.

Patience Gone

The last two postings I have written about SBC and the DSL. I was fine with the E mail conformation. So after I get home tonight from seeing Jules after work, the couple are still moving in so I help them out, after a long day me being up since 5:30, I check my messages on the machine.

Message 1-Hi mikey this is your new roommate Jill can you call me (that was from last night)

Message 2- Hi Mikey just called to see how you are doing will talk later. (Matthew my ex)

Message 3- Hi this is an courtesy call from SBC (automated of course) just confirming your DSL order on this phone number. We would like to know if you are satisfied with our DSL ordering process and prompt service.(LOLOLOL)

Wrong person to ask that question to right now. Like I said in a previous posting, I ordered DSL the last Monday of January. Was informed the order wouldn't go through till line was hooked up which was Friday the same week.

I didn't get the conformation E mail till yesterday a week after my line was hooked up, this balox phone call today both asking are you happy? No, with my patience gone, you are taking almost three weeks to activate my DSL, no I am not happy. To top it all off it's the weekend and they are only open Monday-Friday. HMMM I think Monday SBC DSL will get a confrontational phone call!!

Thanks to Ms. Sizzle for giving me the finger!!!

Oh My God Blogs Work

Yesterday I looked up my account from SBC to see if my DSL was posted. I ordered on the 30 of January. My order still wasn't posted on their website as of last night. So I wrote Dear SBC on my blog and posted it at midnight. When I woke up about 6 this morning to go to work. I checked my E mail and low and behold the conformation for my DSL was waiting for me in my in box. They informed me it wouldn't be turned on till the 16th but now I am a happy camper knowing when it will be activated.

Reading that I was thinking Oh My God Blogs Work, or was this just circumstantial E Mail, or do I have an unknown fan of my blog who works for SBC? In other words, the world may never know?

Dear SBC

SBC, SBC
Where can you be?
DSL Was promised to be today
Do I have to send you a mayday

My dial up is so slow
My computer is being such a ho
With slow transmissions with no submissions
When are you going to give me my transitions?

Today it has been a week
You made my computer so bleak
Yet without an e mail conformation
now you'll hear my confrontation

SBC, SBC
Have you gone to shit becoming AT&T?
DSL was promised to me today
you WILL be hearing my unhappy mayday!!

With Love and Time Out

So I was having one of my achey days, and I so wanted to say goodbye to Jules today at the org. but I also had to be at work early today. So I say with love goodbye and I know we'll stay in touch, the clients will miss you.

I unlocked my bosses room this morning. I told him I would be there early to take care of any inventory shipments, and do some cleaning. Not feeling up to snuff I looked down and saw the mail. Mixed in the mail was a BARF BAG with a note that stated, with love from Joan. My bosses is flying to a convention in Florida in two weeks. I started laughing my ass off only in a salon would I see that. Later in the day my bosses informed they are great to send pictures in if you stuff them with toilet paper to get the point home.

So Big Red's first client wasn't due in till 2. She stops by and informs us that they cancelled. Her client was suspended from school today. The mother said " You are not getting your hair cut today, I am giving you a time out." So wouldn't her client still need a hair cut after the time out?

It's A Girl

I met the couple who are the last roommates moving into the house last night. I knew they had a young child but didn't know the gender. It's a beautiful little girl. This morning when I woke up I herd her in their bedroom making those sounds all babies make when they are happy. I burst out in laughter and I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

About mid morning they brought her out for all the roomies to meet. Instantaneously she stole my heart and is the biggest flirt for being under the age of one. Her mother informed us that she(the baby) would run the house. After a few minutes being around the baby I understood what she meant.

Thundering down the hall way in her walker racing like Jeff Gordon for the pole position, nothing kept the baby from her intended destination. She reminded me of the car owners showing off doing doughnuts, reverse spins ( she loves to walk backwards) and run over you. I said to her father kiddingly" I am going to need to take out an insurance policy." That brought a snicker to the proud father's face.

I think all the roomies are going to enjoy having a youngster in the house, and we will all miss her when she and the couple leave in the next few months.

Dreamer

For the last two to three months I was really down. So down they wanted me to go on medications. I knew those months would be hard for me but didn't realize what I would endure. Now as of the first of the year, as Patti La Belle would say " I have a new attitude, I am feeling good from my head to my shoes."

I am so digging life right now. My health in all aspects just keep improving. Learning HIV is not a death sentence anymore like it was in the 80's and early 90's. Everyday I am pushing myself to be more active, the only draw back is I'm hungry 24-7.

I have started to look to the future. Thinking yes the possibilities are out there for me just waiting to be grabbed. Going into the local surf shops, looking at wetsuits again, soft topped boards, and bodyboards. I received the ok to go back into the water!!! The four, three neoprene suits where like diamonds in my eyes. Not to struggle to live day to day wondering if I was going to be sick. Hope and dreams are entering my being. Wishes and fantasy become a pleasant nights slumber experiences, instead of the vivid nightmares of the past year and half. I have always been a dreamer. To start to want more from life is a huge breakthrough for me. To have meaning and striving for new goals this world will bring me. Yes I will have crisis in my life for that's the way life works. Maybe they won't be as powerful as they were for awhile and I can breath and enjoy life, and celebrate who I am.

The Worst Best Movie I Love

Everyone went wild over the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Today I went put my two cents into cult film classics. Phantom Of The Paradise is one of the tackiest films I have ever seen, it's so bad it's good. Music written, and staring Paul Williams directed by Brian De Palma in 1974. Do those names sound familiar? Paul wrote classic songs for The Carpenters, and you may have seen him in the Smokey and The Bandit films. This film is a mix of Faust and Phantom of the Opera. Check it out and see what I mean. I love this movie!!! A bit a triva for you Sissy Spacek was a set dresser on this film before making it as an actress. She worked again with De palma on the screne in Carrie.

Does This Make Me A Computer Geek

I would like to know if I am becoming a computer geek. Yes the first thing I had to set up in my room was my Jerker computer table, the pc, the monitor, the sound system, the scanner, and the printer. All this before my bed was set up for me to sleep that night. Yes or no, does this make me a computer geek?

The Panic, Stressful, Rainy Night Move

So you all know I moved into the new place Wedsensday night. About a month ago I had made arrangements with Androgynous for him to help me move. I do have to admit I really didn't clarify the move, but he committed knowing I had to be out on the first.

Two days before the move I left a note for Androgynous mail slot at the Org. for him to see me. The next day I talked to him, He was committed to a meeting for the Org., but was able to help with the move so rental truck was needed. He informed me that his ETA would be three pm.

So all last month I have been packing things up slowly. So the move would be quick and simple. How wrong was I to think that thought in my brain. Learning from experience, I should have known no move is ever easy or simple. The frantic last details in which boggle the mind, stress you out, and keep the country from winning the war in Iraq.

To make the move more easy I asked Jules to help me with a car load the night before. Jules being Jules graciously accepted and we packed her car up and took one load over to the new place.

Early that day, while doing errands, the property manager from the place I was moving out of came over. She noticed Jose's things in the room where he wasn't suppose to be. No one was to be in the house with me the last month I was there. She unlocked the all the doors to make sure no one else was in the house.

Later that night, I check my answering machine there is a phone call from her. It went some thing like this:
Hi Mikey this is so and so(she always uses that fake sweet voice on the phone which makes people sick in there stomachs) I stopped by today(unannounced of coarse) and saw someone elses things in one of the upstairs rooms. You know that today was your last day(she knew I was out the next day), If you and that other person are not out with all your stuff we will have to file a trespassing charges and have both of you arrested. Damn my stress level went up to major proportions. Quick a 911 call to Jules to see if she has the number I needed so the property manager could deal with "The Woman."

The Day of the move. Everything Jose and I moved downstairs from my bedroom. Packed and ready to rock and roll to go to the new place. Three O'clock rolls around, there is no sign of Androgynous. This day was a nice day until about 2 then it started to rain. Quarter after 3 I call Jules up at the Org. No sign of him there. I told Jules I wouldn't panic till 4.

4 comes around stress goes into PANIC mode still no word from Androgynous. So 911 call again to Jules. She tells me she been trying to reach on my phone. I had already packed it away for the move. The only line working in the old place was the house phone. Androgynous had an emergency at the Org. and would be over shortly.

Here comes the Calvary about 10 after 5. Androgynous, Jules, Mouse, his girlfriend, and a volunteer from the Org. Who was called at the last minute. So after three small truck loads( I was thinking two) two car fulls of boxes and such I am moved in to my new home.

So I really want to thank Androgynous, Jules, Mouse, His girlfriend (she's cute dude), The volunteer, Jose, and "The Woman" for getting me my new place, and getting me away from the Nightmare On Elm Street.

Why Can't I .....

• Set the correct time on my bosses wall clock without breaking it.
• Find two tapestries for my windows that I like. My bedroom windows are a peeping toms fantasy come true, or a Mikey's nightmare.
• Open the website for the most recent earthquakes in our area. There's the link, can you open it?
• Get my bedroom organized. I think this one has to do with me working the last three days.
• Not piss people off while trying to do the right thing.
• Find a significant other. I'm I that picky or do I just know what I want in a partner and won't settle for less?
• Upload my pictures to blogger dashboard.
• Remember things I need from the store until after I get home from work a few days in a row.
• Find the time to go over to Jules's house and clean her kitchen and bathroom, rough house with their dog Iggy, and play Snoopy ears with Fat Lola.
• Organize my life.
• Make a pizza without almost burning down the house. Really, I am not THAT bad of a cook. (see posting Burning Down The House.)
• Keep my burning down the house posting on my blog.
• Take a bath without locking my self in the bathroom.
• Become a Blog whore. (skip that one I'm already one)
• Write and spell better.
• Find a competition, or a person to publish my best writing ever. I feel my posting about Three Mile Island is the best thing I ever wrote.
• Remember the damn back space button to clear before I paste a hyper link. I always want to hit the enter key on my keyboard.
• Keep my comments on most peoples blogs. If I pissed you off I am sorry!!!

1, 2, 3, 4(00), De Grees Burning Down the House, Or Revenage Of The Spinach

Ok I am back on line. Yeah!!! I am at the new home enjoying the bath tub so much I look like an old man who needs plastic surgery. The room is smaller, but it looks like all or most of my bedroom set will fit. I have a few kinks to work out yet. I would love to write about how I got locked in the bathroom that has the tub (there are 2 bathrooms here) for 10 minutes. Pounding on the door pleading for Jose and Justin (he's the second roommate) to get me a lock smith so I could get out. Needless to say they never herd me and the door finally unlocked and I was free at last!!!

I remember going over to my best friend Greg's house in my teens. He used to have a beat up VW bug with no heater(a bitch in the cold Pennsylvania winters) and who was the spitting image of Benny Hill. MTV was just born, punk and new wave rock was becoming popular, groups like the Clash, Sex Pistols (Mommy what's a Sex Pistol?) B52s and the Talking Heads. I remember the Talking Heads Video "Burning Down the House." The group members being all in cream colored suits, with dark sunglasses on, in front of some television monitors. Like most people "Burning Down The House" was and still is my favorite Talking Heads song. Last night I was reminded of that song.

Last night after work I stopped by Safeway to pick up a Select four cheese, self rising pizza for supper which is my favorite. I get home and open the package, read the directions. Turn oven on to 400 degrees, place pizza on center rack, do not preheat oven. So I do as the instructions require, then ask Jose if he like to join me for a smoke outside. 1, 2, 3, 4, Burning Down The House, well Mikey almost did that last night.

You see one of the former tenants sabotaged the house for the new residents of the house that would be living here. Before I get to what he did to the oven, I want to tell you he also melted candle wax in the microwave and I am sure he did more and will find out later what else he sabotaged. Back to story.

So, Jose and I are out in the car port puffing away and I hear this beeping sound thinking someone's car alarm is going off far away. Now the car port is in the front of the house, the kitchen in back (this place is very long), we get done smoking and realize the smoke detector is blaring. We rush into the kitchen to find Justin there, (I didn't even know he was home, and he could break men's and women's hearts alike if he had a good eyebrow waxing) encased by smoke. The kitchen, dining room, and the reading room were all filled with black smoke.

Justin turning on the stove fan to clear the smoke, I turned off the oven (it's the first time any of us used it(we all moved in 2 days ago.)and Jose noticing food in the broiler section of the stove trough one of the slits in the oven. I looked up to find an oven mit, open the broiler door to find out something was place there so it would catch on fire when we turned on the oven.

grabbing the pan with the oven mit I run to the sink with the pan and doused it with cold water. The former tenant had put two packages of cream spinach underneath. The house has just been renovated and had that nice fresh paint smell to it, now smelling of burnt cardboard and plastic. Yes he put it in there cardboard, boiling bags, and all. This just gives me a whole new reason to hate spinach!!

Moving Today

Moving today. I hope to have dialup access on friday. DSL by next Friday. That's all folks!!